I know what lovesfool means about falling for a guy and then...well, look where we're at now. I'm tryin' to save face by acting calm, but I just really want to smoke a pack of ciggys and wash down a whole bottle of whiskey while joining in Bonnie Raitt's chorus "I can't make you love me...if you don't." Of course, it wasn't really love to begin with. I don't know. I do tend to make really stupid decisions, and this was one of them. Now I'm trying to cope with being single. ::sigh::
You don't have to read the story. it's a whole lotta bitching about the reason for my bitterness.
The said jerk, I find out, has cheated on me. Everyone knows the story, so of course you lose the idiot. But, no. I find out that he didn't even want to carry a relationship with me at all and just thought of me as a "friend," he posted this on a forum instead of telling the girl who thinks she found a decent guy. Right, asshole. I know. And the forum responds with "be careful she's not crazy" and "play her, if you can get away with it." Nice. This is how people help other people out. And, he listened. It's stupid because he knows me well enough that I can handle the truth, I'll write psychotic poetry about it, but it's therapeutic. I wasn't asking for his signature on a marriage license. Jeez...us. I just hate wasting time with someone who doesn't care enough, you know? For example, friends. You don't keep the friends who use you, who are never there and blah blah blah. Pointless, right? It's just like a relationship. If there's nothing there, come clean and cut it off before it heads anywhere too serious. And you know where it headed? To emotional strife, to him telling me he loved me, to sit there and beg me back when I told him he could end it. I gave him a way out and he never took it. I didn't end it because I was too weak. When you see everything you want in a person, you just don't want to let go, and I didn't. So, I forgave and forgave...until I found out he was cheating on me. Sleeping with another girl after preaching to me that he's had it done to him before and he'd NEVER do that. ::rollin' eyes:: The things that come out of guy's mouths. Well, nothing against all Koreans, but this one fit the mold of being an arrogant chauvinistic piece of good looking flesh. Yes, I like Asian guys. *laugh*
So, yes, warning girls. Never trust a Candy Kid Korean Raver. Even if they're really cute and a smooth talker. I didn't, even when I openly told him at face value "You're a player, aren't you?" Aa...being young and naive. Having someone else is always good, but it's too overrated. There's someone for everyone, but I think I lie in the slim 3% who'll end up wickedly single. But in the meantime, I'm hurt, yet amused. Sorry to fill this with gibberish. Anyone's welcome to IM me. AIM s/n is pnaybayb27. Chat w/me and make me feel happier. ok?